Thursday, October 6, 2022

OLD DOG #1 - Review

Do you have a Comic Book Shop Mecca where you live? I don’t. I used to but I don’t anymore which is puzzling because I live in Los Angeles. One would think LA, the breeding ground and destination for comic book geeks seeking fame, fortune, silicon body parts and hipster validation would most certainly accommodate these nerds with a Shop that gleams and glistens in the smoggy sun. Nope. But we did. It was called ‘Meltdown Comics’ and it was glorious.

 

When I first moved to LA I lived around the corner from them on Sunset Blvd when they were a tiny shop on the north side of the street; nothing special. But upon moving to the cavernous space across the street from them the Comic Book Universe in LA changed. This place had everything: new issues, back issues, merch, toys, gear, D&D campaigns, nerds, babes wandering in dressed in mini skirts, combat boots, multicolored knee high socks, pigtails and their midriff showing their newly minted belly ring…it was a Gawker’s Paradise.

 

Celebrities and Comic Book luminaries began pouring in for book signings and shows. The back area became the go-to spot for Comedians and Sketch Artists working out their stuff. Matt Groenig was known to sneak in and sit in the back row. And this was all happening around the corner from me! I was where I was meant to be on the planet, in La La Land and Comic Book Nirvana. The crazy thing was that I didn’t have my pull list at Meltdown. Why? Well, the comic book shop that I actually did go to (and still do) gave customers 20% off and free bags and boards. Meltdown only gave 10% off and no bags and boards. The Jew in me couldn’t resist the deal. Yeah, I don’t care if I have to swim through a cauldron of rotting pigs feet if I’m getting an extra 10-15% off my monthly habit along with some free goodies. But I was always at Meltdown, who wasn’t?

 

I say all this because one day I meandered in and sitting at a table was a very non-descript sheepish scruffy guy who was there to sign his comic books. At first I thought it was Declan Shalvey and I got all excited and happily bought his book. I’m pretty sure I said ‘Thanks Decks!’ It wasn’t him. Oy vey. It was a new comic book creator that was promoting his new work and it was actually great (the name of him escapes me) but every time I see a Declan Shalvey title I always think of me calling his comic doppelganger ‘Decks’. Since then Meltdown has closed its doors, even before the cee ninteen shut down. It couldn’t compete with the digital world and since I knew the guy who ran it pretty well he confided in me that rents in the area were soaring and they just couldn’t keep up. Since then the entire block was razed to the ground and looks like new residences and store fronts are coming in. What a shame. There was also this cool Vegan spot down the block that I supported all the time, loved the owner as well, they did comedy nights there and poetry and music; a wonderful place for the community. And man, the girls that worked there were ridiculously cute.

 

Now you look at the Comic Shop landscape in LA and where’s the mecca? There isn’t one. Yeah, there’s a lot of great shops and cool hole in the walls but nothing that makes you go, ‘Wow, this place is unbelievable’. My fantasy is to one day build that place here. I can't wait to be taken to the hospital when I find out the real numbers and mechanics of the insane variant cover scam.

 

As for this comic, it’s okay. A former wrinkly ornery Agent Guy finds himself on a crap job doing surveillance when all of a sudden he’s back in action due to a simple mission going awry. Next thing you know he’s shooting at a dude in a body suit that inadvertently blows up this enormous machine that somehow turns back time to make him look like the younger version of himself. SPOILER: At the end he’s put back in action with, wait for it…his daughter…and he looks as young as her…and she calls him Dad. And they’re jumping outta windows doing super spy shit together.

 

It’s a cool little wrinkle Decks. I’ll tag along for a bit. I’ll sign up for the long haul if you can email me and remind me who the hell that guy was that looks like you; ‘cause he was a serious comic book bad ass. Now pardon me as I stare out of my window and dream of the day when a cavernous comic heaven welcomes comic geek babes and their mini skirts, combat boots, multicolored knee high socks, pigtails and newly minted belly rings. The funny thing about talking to these girls when you meet them in a comic book shop is that you can't help but sound like Butthead 'So, uh, uh huh huh huh huh, you like, uhhh, Spidey, uh huh huh'.

 

Rating: 7.9

Verdict: Pull

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